I know I think about it a lot, but I don’t think I’ve ever posted about this before: my beef with Teach for America and Peace Corps. I have a variety of friends who’ve done them/are doing them, and I certainly considered it for a while. But eventually I realized that I would never accomplish what really needs to be accomplished by doing either of them.
I’ve created a blog on my domain, and I’m planning on moving over to it soon. For now, however, I’m hanging out here and just using the domain for my Advanced Web Design class. Check it out if you like, but I promise you I’m still trying to think of new things to post.
So this self-portraiture project I’ve been working on since before I started this blog is finally coming to an end. (Sort of.) It will hang in all its glory in less than a month. Awesome? Yes. Nerve wracking? Yes. Still ridiculously awesome? Most definitely.
Here’s what my postcard looks like on the front:
And check out my website for all the details. Yay!
Two things I want to talk about. First, if you’re interested in being an art student, here is my critical piece of advice: stick to your guns and fight for your work. Today we were supposed to have a final showing of our thesis work before the winter break. It was emphasized that the work should be as final as possible. But when we arrived and displayed, the professors (one in particular) seemed to treat it as another crit.
After all the work we’ve put into this project, you expect us to make such drastic changes that you’re suggesting? I realized that this was (unintentionally) a real challenge to our art. Can we defend it? Can we stand by it? Because everyone’s a critic. Everyone has an idea of what direction your work should take, and how it speaks to an audience. In the end, you can’t make everyone happy, and you can’t change your work based on multiple opinions. I wish someone had hammered this into my brain when I started art school. And that’s my two cents.
My second bit is about my desire to leave NYC and be my own woman. I feel this has come into question more often because of my impending graduation. I have loved NYC with all my heart, but it’s time for me to move on. New York has stopped inspiring me. I want to do so many things and go so many places, and I can’t have anything or anyone hold me down. I can’t have someone or something tell me where to go or who to be or what to do. I want to live in Seattle. Maybe I want to try living in Canada, too. I want to work with numerous organizations and film festivals. I want to live in the Bay Area again.
But there are so many people I love here. I have connections here. I have a sweet apartment here. And if I leave, I can never have any of it again. NYC will replace me and forget me like yesterday’s headlines. There are so many people who want what I have, and I can’t decide if I’m willing to let it go.
But I’m tired of feeling like I can’t be who I want to be. If NYC doesn’t like me, it’ll chew me up and tear me apart. There are times here when I feel I can’t be an activist and an educator and a photographer and a baker and anything else I want to be. And it is at those times that I realize again that I can be all of those things, but New York will not let me happy that way. And I know there are people who are all of those things and more here. But NYC wants me to be a New Yorker or get the fuck out, and that’s not who I am. I don’t want to be a New Yorker. I want to be me, and most importantly, I want to be happy.
Decisions, decisions. I have to make dinner now.
I have lots of things I’ve been meaning to say this week, but I’ve slept through my alarm almost every day. I need some time to recover, to get back in the thick of it, complete my thesis, and then chill the fuck out.
Someday there will be more written here, and much more eloquently. I’ll shut up now!
Today in my senior catalog class, we looked at The Diner Journal magazine, and I just need to share it with anyone who reads this.
It is one of the most beautifully made publications I’ve ever seen. The paper is a somewhat heavy matte, but the images still pop and appear rich. Its size makes it feel like a personal book or journal, but still a delicate object. And it’s got it all: food photography, food news, recipes…
I admire people who can make such beautiful books and magazines as art objects. I’m trying, I really am, but I just don’t have a great designer eye. For my senior catalog class, I have to design a book cover for myself, and for my business of art class, I have to create a promotional piece for myself. All useful, practical, and fun things to make – they’re just incredibly time consuming. Kind of like the diet analysis I’m avoiding right now for my nutrition class…